As I sit here with my daughter in her condo in Atlanta, I have glanced at all the magazines she has on her glass coffee table in front of me. Every time I turn the last page of the magazine I'm struck with two thoughts:
1. How does my body, face, skin, and hair compare to those on the magazine pages?
2. I wonder what kind of insecurities the women on those pages face?
As Christians, we've all heard the verse from Psalms that says "I will give thanks to Thee, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made." Although our heads know this, it's hard for our hearts (thighs, tummies, stringy hair) to believe it! We look at women that seem to have it all- and we always fall short of that illusive glossy magazine page. When I get that sinking feeling, I remind myself that even those women on the pages don't look like the images portrayed. Their images have been cut, pasted, air brushed and doctored- and we are the victims that stand wistfully wishing we looked like someone other than ourselves.
At the heart of this is Satan's successful strategy to make us discontent and unhappy with who we are. As long as we stay wrapped up in this blanket, we don't really move freely in our lives- as God intends.
Discontentment leads us to envy what others have that we want. It makes us feel forgotten- as if God overlooked us in certain areas of creation, and it holds us back from freely expressing love and hope in our own lives and the lives of others that God brings to us. I can think back to many times I pushed away from opportunities to love because my pants felt too tight, or I felt intimidated by someone that looked better than me.
The good news is that in God's magazine, we are the front page cover girls! We are precious, and perfect for the exact life He has planned for us. This is more than something we tell ourselves to make us feel better. It is the truth...splashed across the pages of God's word, and the faces of God's women. We are fearfully and wonderfully made- no matter how the current magazine cover makes us feel.
Sunday, January 24, 2010
Tuesday, January 12, 2010
Can you picture your life free from weird behavior with food? What would a day released from the nag of food look like? Many women I know have answered these questions with painful resolve. "I can't even pretend to picture a day in my life that's not wrecked by food..." they moan.
In the book of Habakkuk 2:3 God tells us to record our vision, so that the one who reads it may run. When I first began to get free from food bondage, I remember reading this verse, and literally creating a vision of myself free from the torture of my mental bullying with food. As I began to write this vision down, I enjoyed the thoughts of waking up in the morning with something other than food on my mind. I loved to imagine going through my day not thinking about what I could and could not eat, and dressing for the day without a barrage of negative comments smacking against my heart. At first I thought the vision was just wishful thinking, but then I read further into the verse.
"For the vision is yet for the appointed time; It testifies about the end, and it cannot lie.
Though it delays, wait for it, it will not fail. It certainly will come."
I realized that I needed to have a vision of my life, free from anorexic restriction and compulsive overeating. I needed to picture this life, and how I could live in it. Although it felt like the impossible dream at first- I wrote it down, and continued to look at it. The vision of freedom became my prayer of hope.
Oswald Chamber defines tenacity as "The absolute certainty that what you hope for will transpire." With God, tenacious prayer and vision always align with His character. He breathes life into our hopeless vision of ourselves, and helps us recreate a new vision of who we were mean to be.
In the book of Habakkuk 2:3 God tells us to record our vision, so that the one who reads it may run. When I first began to get free from food bondage, I remember reading this verse, and literally creating a vision of myself free from the torture of my mental bullying with food. As I began to write this vision down, I enjoyed the thoughts of waking up in the morning with something other than food on my mind. I loved to imagine going through my day not thinking about what I could and could not eat, and dressing for the day without a barrage of negative comments smacking against my heart. At first I thought the vision was just wishful thinking, but then I read further into the verse.
"For the vision is yet for the appointed time; It testifies about the end, and it cannot lie.
Though it delays, wait for it, it will not fail. It certainly will come."
I realized that I needed to have a vision of my life, free from anorexic restriction and compulsive overeating. I needed to picture this life, and how I could live in it. Although it felt like the impossible dream at first- I wrote it down, and continued to look at it. The vision of freedom became my prayer of hope.
Oswald Chamber defines tenacity as "The absolute certainty that what you hope for will transpire." With God, tenacious prayer and vision always align with His character. He breathes life into our hopeless vision of ourselves, and helps us recreate a new vision of who we were mean to be.
Friday, January 8, 2010
Struggles
I listened to a message today that was left for me on my voice mail. It was one of my sweet friends that has been through Truly Fed classes, and currently leads a group called Truly Fed: Going Deeper, when I am away. The tone of her voice was sad and defeated- yet at the end of the message she mentioned the powerful word hope. What do we do during times of struggle? How is it possible to experience seasons of freedom with food, and then fall back into patterns of destruction and despair?
We shouldn't be surprised when these times smash into our lives. We should expect them. When Jesus was teaching His disciples to pray, He said "Lead us away from temptation" not "Keep them perfect and robotic!" When freedom is your heart cry with food-- giving up binges and overeating, walking away from restriction and starvation, or denying the urge to purge what's been ingested-- there is always what I call a holy tension that takes place. You want to pursue the freedom and the hope of life free from compulsion, but sometimes a dark force seems to take over and we end up behaving in ways that we hate. Paul got it right when he described this battle in Romans. "Why do I do the very thing I hate?" he moaned. Then he reflected that it was the sin inside him. But he didn't stay stuck there. His next utterance was "Thank goodness I have a Savior that doesn't condemn and has set me free from this horrible predicament." When you feel like you are returning to old behavior, recognize that Satan likes to whisper to you that people really don't change. He wants you to believe that what you thought was freedom was just a temporary blip on your screen of failure with food. During the phase in which I was healing from food bondage I remember saying "I know I'm free. I'm just not acting like it this moment." This enabled me to believe in a bigger freedom movement that was taking place in my life- not just the small picture of a momentary action. Your freedom isn't a blip...it is the picture of your new life!
We shouldn't be surprised when these times smash into our lives. We should expect them. When Jesus was teaching His disciples to pray, He said "Lead us away from temptation" not "Keep them perfect and robotic!" When freedom is your heart cry with food-- giving up binges and overeating, walking away from restriction and starvation, or denying the urge to purge what's been ingested-- there is always what I call a holy tension that takes place. You want to pursue the freedom and the hope of life free from compulsion, but sometimes a dark force seems to take over and we end up behaving in ways that we hate. Paul got it right when he described this battle in Romans. "Why do I do the very thing I hate?" he moaned. Then he reflected that it was the sin inside him. But he didn't stay stuck there. His next utterance was "Thank goodness I have a Savior that doesn't condemn and has set me free from this horrible predicament." When you feel like you are returning to old behavior, recognize that Satan likes to whisper to you that people really don't change. He wants you to believe that what you thought was freedom was just a temporary blip on your screen of failure with food. During the phase in which I was healing from food bondage I remember saying "I know I'm free. I'm just not acting like it this moment." This enabled me to believe in a bigger freedom movement that was taking place in my life- not just the small picture of a momentary action. Your freedom isn't a blip...it is the picture of your new life!
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