Embarrassment

Written by: Gari

The other day I was sitting at a baseball game watching the fans around me (Don’t tell my husband that I wasn’t watching the game!)  I couldn’t help but notice a young couple that was obviously on their first date.  They were performing for each other; telling jokes, laughing, nudging each other’s arms in a playful game of hopeful bliss.  Everything seemed to be going fine until the pretty girl took a bite of her hot dog and it sprayed ketchup and mustard into her eyes! The more she rubbed them the more she looked like a clown ready for a circus. 

            She was so embarrassed that she finally took a heap of napkins and ran for the ladies’ room.  When she came back to her seat she was a little less playful.  Actually, she was a bit shy—and I got the sense that embarrassment got the best of her.  It has a way of doing that.

            My guess is that embarrassment has robbed us all of some finer moments.  I know I’ve had my share of knee-slappers when it comes to looking stupid, but what really shakes me up is spiritual embarrassment.  Deeper and more cutting than physical embarrassment, spiritual embarrassment has the power to snatch me away from God’s glory.  It dresses itself to look cute, but underneath the attractive exterior it’s nothing but a bogus counterfeit to authentic belief. Let’s peek into embarrassment’s closet and see if we’re wearing any of its latest designs.

·       When God doesn’t deliver the answers we hoped for after praying publicly with our requests; we’re embarrassed we made ourselves so vulnerable. 

·       When God moves or engages people in ways we don’t understand, we feel like we need to defend His reputation—or worse, distance ourselves from Him so we won’t be associated with questions we don’t have answers for.

·       Filled with confidence in most areas of life, when it comes to talking about Jesus we clam up, embarrassed that we may step on some pedicured toes.

·       Going to church is great, but when asked to lead or volunteer in ways that place us outside our sphere of security, the answer is always an immediate “no thanks.”

Unfortunately, I’ve worn some of the clothes from this closet—and I'm embarrassed to say--they're not so pretty. 

Always a lover of drama, the Apostle Peter is a man after my own heart.  If there’s action, he wants in on it.  Yet, as bold and in love with Jesus as he was, one of his toughest opponents was spiritual embarrassment. 

            Peter, like every other faithful Jew, had been waiting for a Messiah; for someone that would sweep away the political landscape and overturn the Roman government’s power and abuse.  He knew He had found this Messiah in Jesus, but towards the end of Jesus’ life, the political coup wasn’t playing out like Peter thought.  When Jesus began talking about suffering, and eventually being murdered; Peter pulled Jesus aside to let Him know this kind of talk was a little embarrassing to the cause. 

"From that time Jesus Christ began to show His disciples that He must go to Jerusalem and suffer many things from the elders and chief priests and scribes, and be killed, and raised up on the third day.  And Peter took Him aside and began to rebuke Him saying, 'God forbid it, Lord!  This shall never happen to you.' "  (Matthew 16: 21-22)

I can just picture Peter taking Jesus aside to rebuke Him.  Oh... the patience of Jesus is astounding!  What came over Peter to make him think he could tell Jesus how His life should play out? Simply put...embarrassment.  He had traveled with Jesus, served with Jesus, and had big plans for Jesus.  I wonder if Peter could have avoided his famous denial if he hadn't been so embarrassed by the events God choose to make His son a King.   

That's the rub...God chooses how He wants our lives to play out, and if we bravely keep from being embarrassed by the way it looks; we're on our way to glory.  Kids misbehaving, marriages that struggle, habits we need help overcoming, prodigals that leave God after years in a youth group, downsizing, capsizing, overturning...may cause an initial blush of confusion; but if we boldly look to God rather than circumstances to define our lives--we'll never have to bow our heads in embarrassed shame.

Blessings!

Gari

Anticipation

Written by: Jessica Russo

There has been an underlying solemn mood in my 8-year old son (Bryce) the past week and I could not pinpoint the problem until last night it hit me: Anticipation. His little mind is stirring with anticipation of the quickly approaching first day of school. The strange thing about it is he is excited to see his friends again but the negative thoughts of schoolwork, embarrassment, and overall struggle of last year is far outweighing any positive anticipation.

The term anticipation is defined as: 1. The act of anticipating. 2. An expectation. 3. Foreknowledge, intuition, and presentiment. I have always thought of the word as having a positive connotation. The bible uses it as a positive outlook of hope and excitement. Revelation 16:15 promises a blessing for those who are watching for the Lord with anticipation: "Behold, I am coming as a thief. Blessed is he who watches."

On the flip side of the word there can also be a negative anticipation. I remember as I studied for my Real Estate Broker exam, the more I prepared and anticipated the test the more nervous I became. Although I knew I was fully prepared for what awaited me I was still consumed with fear.

As for my little man starting school, his anticipation has led to worry, worry to fear, and fear to self-doubt. This is the form of anticipation that can sneak in and overwhelm you before you even realize it. The bible speaks against this negative anticipation in Matthew 6:34: “Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble."

As I researched a bit on this topic I came across a quote that I love:

If pleasures are greatest in anticipation, just remember that this is also true of trouble.
-Elbert Hubbard

So true! When planning a vacation or trip of some kind our mind can get an exaggerated excitement in anticipation for that event, that the event itself could never live up to our expectation, and leaves us disappointed every time.

Also, when we are negatively anticipating a test or performance of some kind our mind will develop an exaggerated worry or fear for that event that could leave us feeling foolish for ever worrying about it in the first place.

The lesson I have learned through this is that we are not to anticipate the things of this world. We are only to anticipate the return of our Lord and his promises and blessings revealed to us. These are the thoughts, plans, and hopes that will sustain our peace and happiness on this earth.

John 14:27 Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid.

As the children begin making preparations for school in a few weeks I pray for their Strength to face adversity, Courage to defend righteousness, Confidence to believe in themselves, Motivation to develop their minds, a Servants Heart toward others, and a perfect peace only our Heavenly Father can provide.

May we anticipate things not of this world but of Him, His plan, His promises, His blessings, and His peace.

Blessings,
Jessica

I can only imagine...

The other night Bobby and I had the privilege of opening up for the band Mercy Me.  We shared our testimony along with a pitcher from the Astros and his wife Rachel.  This picture was taken with the band, standing in the midst of sunflower seeds and spit in the Astros dug out!  I was so honored to serve alongside this band because they happen to be the authors of my all-time favorite song; I Can Only Imagine. 

 I don't know what it is about this song, but every time I hear it I come undone. As they sang to this  huge crowd gathered at the ballpark we were all on our feet; eyes closed, tears streaming down our cheeks, arms raised to heaven as if we could touch its glory through the words we were echoing.  I looked at Bobby, our daughter Ally, and my sweet friend Ronda when the last notes of the song came to an end, and we couldn't speak.  There are moments when only tears express the emotion of the heart, and this was one of them. 

This song is so anointed that it seems to breathe hope at funerals, Sunday gatherings, and youth rallies as it speaks to the first moments we will see Jesus face to face in heaven.  Does anyone dare sing about that?  Do we even try to imagine that scene?  Although I've been told about heaven since I was small, it's still so mysterious and unknown-- yet when Mercy Me describes it; it's strangely comforting. 

I can only imagine, what it will be like--when I walk, by your side.
I can only imagine, what my eyes will see--when Your face is before me.
Surrounded by your glory, what will my heart feel? Will I dance for you Jesus, or in awe of You be still? 
Will I stand in your presence, or to my knees will I fall, will I sing Hallelujah...will I be able to speak at all?  I can only imagine...I can only imagine...

When I was a young believer I remember bragging to someone that when I saw Jesus in heaven I would high-five Him and say "My BFF, Jesus, You're the man!"  This mature lover of God humbly replied "It might be hard to high-five if you're flat on your face before Him."  That was the first time I remember feeling completely undone by the thought of seeing Jesus face to face.  I can only imagine...

Last week I was in a recording studio for two days as we recorded the audio version of my book Spirit Hunger.  Something weird happened to me as I came to certain part of the book, a book that I'm obviously acquainted with.  When I began to read a section that described my father, I had to stop the recording and gather myself as tears fell like rainfall against the pavement.  I was describing the state of his limp legs after living for 38 years as a paralyzed man.  I hadn't seen his legs undressed until a few days before his death.  They were covered in sores, oozing puss, and mere bones with a thin strip of skin around them.  I practically gasped when the nurse pulled back his sheets to shift his position in the bed.  Ever since his car accident when I was young I felt distanced from my dad.  He went into a protective shell to somehow survive his new life; once a bank president, now a quadriplegic.  Strangely, I've felt more drawn to my dad since his death than I did during his life. I don't remember ever crying over him when I was in my late teens or young adulthood, and now, every time I talk about him I cry.  I think the words Mercy Me captured in their song are the reason why.

When I picture heaven one of the scenes I relish most is seeing my dad dance before Jesus on legs that were once twisted, pussing, and useless.  That thought alone makes me bow in reverence to the one I call Lord.  But then I picture another scene.  I see me dancing with my dad and Jesus.  A holy concert of grace and abandon as we turn and glide with Jesus leading the dance.  A former disco dance teacher, I like to get everyone in a line and turn out steps in unison, but Jesus does it differently.  He likes to dance uniquely with each dance partner He holds. 

I have no idea what heaven will be like, but I do know this, it will be greater and wilder than anything we can conjure.  Sometimes I'm shocked by how tightly we hold onto life here...forgetting that a greater dance floor awaits us in heaven.
I can only imagine....I can only imagine...

Blessings!
Gari



The words to this verse showered me