Giving More Presence

A few weeks ago Bobby and I attended a conference called Pro Athletes Outreach. It was a powerful time for athletes and their wives to refuel and refocus who we are and what we do.

One of the featured speakers was a pastor from St. Louis. He was one of those guys that you love to listen to. Hip but not trite. Authentic without being pushy. On the last day of the conference he shared something that has blown across the nation like a storm. He called it The Advent Conspiracy. It's wildly simple in its tenants- yet considered a "conspiracy" because it's so counter to the direction our culture swims. Even Whoopi Goldberg is talking about it- and that's huge...

*Spend less on yourself
*What you don't spend on yourself try to give to someone or something
*Give your loved ones more presence than presents

That last one really got me. What does it mean to give people my presence? Presents are easy. You buy them, wrap them, and give them away... But presence is different. Presence means that I will really listen to what my kids/husband/ and friends are saying. Instead of token nods and hurried listening- I will truly engage in what they are saying. I will think about their concerns and pray for them sincerely after our conversations are through.

Jesus was the master of presence. Everything about Him oozed authentic engagement. He fed people that were hungry. He healed people that were hurting. He laughed and cried with His friends. He pleaded with His Father for the hearts of people.

Have you ever noticed that Jesus never gave a present that was bought and wrapped? You don't read about Him popping into the Jerusalem Target to pick up a few gifts. He simply gave His presence- and that was big enough to alter the world.

I still have wrapped gifts under the tree, and I can't wait for our family to enjoy them, but this year I'm more concerned with presence...a gift that no price tag can define.

Blessings...
Gari

Life is Like a Sticky Note

I am addicted to sticky notes. I've been known to walk around for a full hour with a sticky note attached to my forehead. The fluorescent colors make me wild, and don't even get me started on the sticky notes that come in the shape of a heart or flower...
I use stickies for a myriad of purposes: to remind me of something I need to do, someone I need to talk to, or something I need to pray about. To mark a powerful part of something I'm reading, something I need to use in my writing, or something I want to use when I teach.

When I was in Uganda this summer working with kids and teachers at an orphanage, it was fascinating to see their reaction to sticky notes. Just the colors and fact they stuck on everything, including skin, was enough to hold the kids spell bound- regardless of the purposes we were trying to introduce for their use. Let's face it- sticky notes are one of the great inventions of the last few decades. If I could personally thank the creator of the colorful little square paper with a glue-like tab at the top I would.

As I ponder the wonders of sticky notes I'm reminded of the picture you see at the top of my blog. I snapped this photo at the end of a gathering I led. We all had piles of sticky notes in front of us, and we silently wrote out sticky after sticky reflecting on what we feared- the voices that plagued our minds reminding us of how we fall short or somehow seem to disappoint God- or the ways we constantly seem to boomerang back to old patterns of behavior we hate.

When we were done writing on the stickies, I asked the group to gather around a table where we quietly stuck them, one by one, on the cross.

At first it seemed a little contrived and weird. Sticky notes on a cross? But when we were done, and the tears were falling, it was actually quite beautiful. Like a Christmas tree that is adorned with lights and sparkles, the cross was now adorned with pain, conflict, and a kind of fluorescent hope.

To be able to put our fears on the cross is the ultimate sticky note. You can write them out, then get rid of them- not needing to keep them attached to your forehead as a reminder of past failures. They now stick to the cross- where Jesus bears their print.

"For it was the Father's good pleasure for all the fullness to dwell in Him, and through Him to reconcile all things to Himself, having made peace through the blood of His Cross..." (Colossians)

If you need a little sticky note therapy this week, I encourage you to get a pack and write like crazy. But don't keep the sticky notes around you or on you, put them on a cross.

Blessings-
Gari

Does God Like You?

As I sit at a table in my office (Panera Bread) and write, I am struck with how many holy encounters seem to take place in this restaurant. Behind me I hear a woman sharing her broken heart over a failed relationship. Next to me a team of teachers meet to discuss the problems they encounter with a certain troubled teen. Across from them sits an elderly man, alone, while he brings his hot chicken noodle soup to his lips.

Christmas is nearing, and as I look at the cookies and bread displayed on the counter, and the "huddles" of people gathering to talk or share a problem- a question stirs in me... "Does God like us?" I mean it. Does He like us?

We hear the litany of religious phrases that say God loves us. He has a plan for our lives, and so on. But does He like us?

The last few days one line of scripture has circulated and percolated in my mind. It's from the gospel of Luke in a scene that is utterly unexpected and wild.

After Mary gave birth to Jesus in a stable filled with animals and manure, she may have been questioning whether she had missed God's best. Was this really the way that God planned for His son to enter the scene? At the very least maybe she could have expected a bed with sheets rather than straw and animal sounds. But here's where the story comes full circle.

In that same region some shepards were on a hill. We tend to romanticize shepards now days because when you really think about it- how many shepards do you know? But during Mary's day, the shepards were the blue-collar workers who did the hard work with little pay or glory. Think of them as modern day truckers... So on a cold winter's night all of the sudden heaven ripped open and thousands and thousands of angels are singing and partying, the likes of which we can only imagine- and do you know what they said?
" Glory to God in the highest,
and on earth peace to mankind
with whom He is pleased."

In the midst of the Christmas story, and the pain or busyness of life, we tend to overlook these words. God is pleased with us.

It's not because we have behaved well. It's not because we are the most attractive religiously. The shepards certainly weren't the most attractive, influential people of their day. As a matter of fact they were somewhat snubbed and looked down on. Yet isn't it mind blowing that they were the first to hear this life changing news?

God likes you. He is pleased with you. And He has sent a gift beyond compare in His son Jesus. A baby born into the manure of a stable- much like the manure of our life.

From that event rings the cry of God to the world... I like you. I am thrilled with you. Let the angels party and sing with abandon because this is still His love song over our lives.

Blessings-
Gari

Crushing Waves

Do you ever feel like your life resembles trying to swim under this wave? Just the sheer magnitude and power of the water is enough to make you lose your breath- let alone the current it has to tumble you under its weight.

There have been times in my faith where I felt like a beginning surfer trying to navigate the surf off the coast of Australia... Unprepared, weak, insignificant, and used to a sense of failure when it comes to big waves. The pull and undertow of habits and compulsions seem to draw me in- ready to destroy the peace and promise I know is mine in Christ...but sometimes seems like an illusive dream.

In the fourth chapter of Mark an amazing story about waves takes place. Jesus is in a boat with His disciples, asleep- when the weather takes a drastic change. Fierce gale winds are tossing the boat around, and the waves are coming in over the side of the boat...so much so that the bible says the boat is filling up!

In the midst of this mini-Titanic Jesus is asleep in the front of the boat. This is symbolic on so many levels. The disciples are in a full panic- standing over the sleeping Savior while wringing their hands in worry and despair. Finally they wake Him up with a comment that is passive,aggressive, and downright angry... "Teacher, don't you care that we are perishing?" Jesus looks around at the waves, possibly yawns, and says "Hush, be still." The Bible says that the wind died down and it became perfectly calm. Seriously...

I love what Jesus says to the disciples (and to us) next. He says "Why are you so timid? How is it that you have no faith?" Goodness knows that when waves are crashing around us the last thing we typically feel is filled with faith- yet Jesus says "Don't be timid- you don't have to be afraid!"

Truthfully, the reason we don't have to be afraid has nothing to do with the capacity of our faith. It has everything to do with the fact that Jesus is on your boat ...and He isn't afraid. That's where I put my faith. Not in the craftsmanship of the boat maker, not in the weather patterns of the sea, and certainly not in my ability to surf the currents...it's in His ability to stop the crashing waves of my life with one word, or to be my personal lifeguard when the undertow is too strong.

Blessings!
Gari

Extreme Life Makeover

This picture was taken of me (on the left) and a few of the Astro's wives as we stopped by the set of Extreme House Makeover this summer. A family in Houston was selected to receive a new home- and we got to be a part of seeing this happen. The family of 7 lived in a literal shack. To make matters worse, since the hurricane that hit this area a few years ago, rats lived in the home with them! They were a deserving family who counseled married couples and helped those in their community. To see a beautiful home resurrected on the same property that their former shack sat on was pure inspiration.
It got me thinking about how God does Extreme Life Makeovers on us... The kind of makeover that can rebuild a life broken from habits, compulsion, and despair. The kind of makeover that says "I don't care how trashed out you are, or what condition the walls of your life are in...I can rebuild them."

It was fascinating to watch the "real" process of the home makeover- not the version we watch on TV (which I love...and always have a box of Kleenex handy). The day of the reveal it was about 100 degrees, and humidity to match. But people showed up in herds. The camera men asked us to yell "move that bus" about 15 different times so they could capture just the right angle on film. Once the family got out and there were screams and cries- they went into their new home. Quickly I realized that the home wasn't even near completion! I was told by one of the directors that they were ushered into a small unfinished room, and it would actually take another week at least to finish the home. So much for "reality" TV! I wanted to believe that it romantically transpires just like we see on the television- the door opens and it's automatically lovely. The truth is... it takes time. Just like God's work in us takes time.
When we let Jesus rebuild, remake, repaint, uncover, and restore- we witness an unveiling like no other.

I know God's Extreme Life Makeovers are possible. I was chosen for one, and have been crying in thanks ever since. Instead of "Move that bus!" maybe we can cry out "Change my life...".

It's the ultimate reality...
Blessings!
Gari

Asking, Seeking, Knocking

One day after Jesus had spent some time praying, when He returned to His disciples they asked Him to teach them how to pray. Jesus started by showing His pattern for prayer... "Father , hallowed is your name... (praise and posture of worship)
Your kingdom come...(what you are doing in the spiritual realm, let us see in the physical realm) Give us this day our daily bread...(give me what food I need to sustain and enjoy, not to abuse or be compulsive with) And forgive us our sins... (and help me to forgive myself when I've messed up with food because I wouldn't treat others as harshly as I treat myself) And lead us not into temptation... (help me to realize that freedom isn't the absence of temptation, but the ability to not get sucked into it)...

After Jesus shared this model of prayer, He gave an example of a man that was quite frankly, rude in his behavior. At about midnight, he comes banging on his neighbor's door looking for food. It wasn't even food for himself or his family because they were in need, it was simply food for some people that had dropped by. Like going to a friend's house at midnight to borrow a pizza for some other friends. Rude! But Jesus uses this man, rude behavior and all to prove a point. He says that even though this man was ridiculous in his behavior, because of his persistence, he got what he needed.

In other words, when we are postured for real prayer, not prayer whining or worry with a few "God words" attached... with some persistence, we will hear God. We will see Him move, work , and show us ways to move towards freedom and hope with food rather than defeat and wallowing.

If we persistently ask God to open our eyes to layers of healing, to inspire us with His word and the hope for a different relationship with food... life begins to change.

Much love sweet blogging friends...
Gari

Garbage in the trash can or garbage in my body

It's the day after Halloween. Our doorbell rang off the wall last night for about three hours as I dashed to the door to hand out candy of all sorts to little warriors, princesses, super heroes and cheerleaders. They were darling! (For my readers from Africa we have this custom in America on October 31 where kids dress in costumes, go from house to house, and get candy that they store in a bag or pillowcase!)

When I knew it was too late for another trick-or-treater I looked at Bobby and sighed. We bought too much candy...again! I'm really not a big candy lover, and Bobby only enjoys it occasionally. So we accessed our candy loot, saved a few pieces we thought we would like, and threw the rest out. I know some readers are gasping right now! What about the waste? Why couldn't we find a way to give it away? How can you put something as yummy as candy in the trash?

Back when I was teaching I would bring the leftover stash to my classroom and use it throughout the year- but since I don't have a classroom now, it goes into the trash- and I can honestly tell you it doesn't bother me a bit. As a matter of fact- it's actually quite liberating.

I remember a time when I would have compulsively eaten away at that candy stash...damaging my heart, soul, body and teeth! Somewhere along the line we have bought the lie that if we throw food out we are terrible people. Yet we are willing to waste it in our bodies. The logic is crazy, yet we abide by it, thinking it's better to eat food we don't want or need to avoid wasting it. Here's a bit of truth to chew on... Our bodies are not garbage cans to be filled with compulsive amounts of food.

It's so freeing to throw something out instead of consuming it in guilt and deceit.

I often think of these words penned by the apostle Paul "Food is for the stomach, and the stomach is for food; but God will do away with both of them. Yet the body is not for immorality, but for the Lord- and the Lord is for the body." (1 Cor. 6:13)

In other words, all the fretting, hiding, dieting, binging, and lamenting food...in the end- means nothing. It's just food. Our bodies (and sane minds) are for the Lord, and He is for our bodies. How wonderful!

So if you struggle with not wasting food, please realize that eating compulsively to not waste- is waste inside our bodies. It's OK to get rid of food that you don't really want or need. I often say this phrase "Garbage in the trash can, garbage in my body- I'll pick the trash can..."